A HANDY GUIDE TO ATTENDING HARLAN ELLISON APPEARANCES FOR THE COMPLETE IDIOT:


    DO:

  • mind the questions you ask; he may answer them.
  • bring a dictionary; Harlan uses lots of big words, and if you ask him what they mean he will eat your soul.
  • mention whatever comic book, TV show or movie you have seen which makes reference to him personally; he loves that.
  • bring something for him to sign; he'll never admit it, but he loves to sign things.

    DO NOT:

  • ask him to sign a PowerBook (trust me).
  • ask him where he gets his ideas.
  • make reference to the 'Enemies of Ellison' club.
  • say anything bad about Robin Williams or Ralph Nader.
  • get him started on politics, religion, music, the Holocaust, orinthology, exobiology, UFOs, the history of cheese in Wisconsin, or anything else you do not wish to learn about in voluminous detail.

    PLEASE PLEASE FOR GOD'S SAKE WHATEVER YOU DO, ABSOLUTELY DO NOT:

  • call him a 'sci-fi writer'; it isn't so much the colorful epithet he whips up on the spot especially for you....but it's the look he gives you just before he starts.

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